There’s a first time for everything.

Last week I did my first gig with the wonderful Barefoot Doctor under the name Barefoot and Leakster. 

Andy Dovey joined us on percussion half way through and I danced my way through the set, pressing midi pedals, triggering loops and playing guitar and singing. I was too busy at the time to know if the gig was going well so now I've had some time for reflection.

I remember some years ago seeing one of my favorite TV shows called Six Feet Under and one of the characters was an art student and the teacher was saying “You must paint from the eye inside, everything you do should be a surprise to the earth” Well last Wednesday there was a surprise to the earth.  A collection of people in a lovely venue in Chertsey courtesy of the lovely people at Naked Dragon got to see and hear the Barefoot and Leakster experience for the first time. I think it was a positive experience for all concerned. It should be as it was billed as “Positive Message Music” The idea was that we would re-create the album we have been working on this last year in a live environment. The wonderful thing about live is that you don’t know what’s going to happen. This was the first time we would be sharing our music. The first time people would hear it, respond to it and judge it.  What happens if they don’t like it? What happens if they just walk off and we are left singing to an empty room? That’s happened to me before and certainly makes a man of you!

On the night, in the end, there was laughter, fun, some dancing, some clapping, a fair amount of lead guitar histrionics, positive rapping and all in all it seemed to go well. Before the last song called “Connected” I asked people if they would stay connected and fill out some feed back forms and tell us what they really thought. Here’s a selection of comments:

“I had a wonderful evening. I love your music so much - and the messages within
And your energy and presence. Thank you for a wonderful memorable experience” - J.A.

“I left feeling warm and happy, with a contended heart.” – M.E.

“The music was good. For me cool guitar & effects, a mix of blues, soft rock (floydish), soft trance and a bit cafe del mar The lyrics were uplifting (stuff happens but all is good...), made me ponder, connect with emotions and let go” - L.J.

I think that’s wonderful. It shows that the first time we did it… it seems to have connected with some people. That’s good for my ego – it also says we did something right. And I’d like to do it again. I’d like to spread this music to people far and wide because it seems to have the power to move people and connect them and get them singing and their feet tapping. What more do we need in these tumultuous times?

One of my favorite moments from the night was a lady who came and congratulated me on the song “Get Spanky” which deals with focusing on good stuff in order to make it grow. She said that she worked with people who were recovering from addictions and played it to them to help them think about focusing on good things. That was amazing to hear. To know that something I’ve worked on, labored over and poured love into is being received and is of use to people who might be struggling in there lives makes a wonderful connection for me, a wonderful way to give something of myself back to the world. 

There are some great pictures of the event here thanks to Ian Legge and on our facebook page and hopefully some videos to follow soon. Thank you for coming, thank you for listening.

Wishing I Had Tried

Wishing I Had Tried

I think I read my first self help book when I was about 18. On any one of my darker days I’ll be browsing one of the countries disappearing lovely bookshops with my ever patient girlfriend and I’ll pull random self help books off the shelf and say “read that, didn’t help…..read that …loada bull****” etc. My girlfriend once turned to me and said “They all helped, you just might not know how yet.”

In that first book something really stood out to me and has stuck with me and has helped me. The author was talking about why people don’t act on their ideas and was asking you to imagine how you would feel if you got to the point where you are about to depart this world and you suddenly realized there was all this stuff you could of done. It sort of jolted me really. I can’t think of anything worse than laying there dieing and unable to move and feeling the regret and wishing I had tried to do something. At the time I was thinking about writing songs but not really trying, not really knowing if I was good enough etc… so I wrote a song about it.

I tried to imagine what it would be like and how horrible it would be:

Look into my eyes see the hurt inside the smiles just a disguise

I’m jovial and keen upfront but hurting here inside

‘Cause I have wasted time and watched life from the side

I realize right now I should have tried

Now I’m lying on my death bed wishing , wishing I had tried

Watch the silver screen, all the people that are living out my dream

A dream I’ve often thought of as I lie hear it would seem that my only chance has been and gone and been and gone and been

And now I’m lying on my death bed wishing wishing I had tried

Wishing all those days away, wishing I had tried.

Look around the world, all the people

but especially that girl I’ve seen her walking here before

but never said a word I just hope she’ll smile

You never know but I’ve been here for quite a while

I like to think of this song as a call to action and a warning not to let your life end up like this. Go and make that song, have a relationship, paint, risk, learn, buy sell, do all the things that a human being can do. Because even if you do them all there will probably still be a part of you on your death bed saying ”If only I’d….” Or maybe not, maybe the parting words might be more like Oscar Wildes who apparently said "This wallpaper is atrocious either it or I have to go."

I’ll be playing this song and many others at the forthcoming Bunkfest – an amazing free festival of music, food, beer and a great atmosphere. www.bunkfest.co.uk

Completion?

When is anything ever truly finished? I’m reminded of an interview with William Friedkin director of The Exorcist having just completed the “Final 30 Year Anniversary Directors Cut of Cuts” or something and he said “At some point you have to leave it and move on” He told the story of Pissarro going into the Louvre with his palette and touching up paintings hanging on the gallery wall, the security guard dragging him away.

“But it is mine to change!” wailed Pissarro “ No, no, no “ replied the guard ”Its on the wall. That means its finished”

My solo album has been finished and printed and arrived and I hold in my sticky hands a CD titled “Smile”. It’s a beautiful thing. Songs that I have written months or even years ago finally have a place in the world because they are up on iTunes and printed on a CD, that’s final. After many months of existing in my studio of recording, mixing, editing, re- recording, fixing and finally mastering they now live somewhere else. Some of the songs were from when I first started writing, some from bands I worked with. I remember when one band finished one of the members said “What a shame, those songs…nothing will happen with them” That must of stuck in my head because I kept some of them and recorded them. Others are moments in time when I just went into the studio with an idea and crafted it from there.

But is anything really finished? I still play these songs live and who knows I might re-record a song or a live version. There could be a remix or a re-master at some time.

All I can say is that “Smile” is the statement of the songs then, that is how they were recorded and mixed and created at that time, an audio snapshot of where I was with these songs, with these abilities and the ears that I currently posses. I’m still recording and still learning and still creating and all of that is moving forward and changing until I finalise it and make another snapshot. Until then ‘Smile” exists as a moment in time that I’m very, very proud of.

You can hear the album and there are some free MP3s here: http://soundcloud.com/russellleak

www.russellleak.com

New Music

For the last few months I've been slaving away in my studio with Barefoot Doctor. www.barefootdoctorglobal.com To say I was slaving is something of a misnomer 'cause though the work has been hard its been so much fun that I daren't call it work. Songs have just appeared one after the other. Mainly flowing from the creative juices of the good doctor. It seems to me his musicality has been stifled a bit over the years and being with me and my girlfriend has allowed him to be the great musician he really is. He's flourished I'd say in the deepest part of Oxfordshire, hidden from view in order to reveal himself. He's come with a riff an idea a chord or a bass line, I'd find a beat and then we were off. Jamming over a musical barren landscape. Fleshing it out with some melodies here, some words there, a stab of keys, a lead guitar , a shaker. Carving the uncarved block until its soundscape revealed itself. I remember as a kid watching Rolf Harris "Do you know what it is yet?"he'd say and I'd think "Does HE know?". We dont know until the song is finished. We feel our way until its stopped speaking to us and then we have a sandwich and a cup of tea and talk about how hard it is being a human being.

And now we have a good number of songs in the can....what shall we do with them? A thousand meaningless thoughts drift across our collective conscious post sandwich, pre-mix...."Music has lost its value, people dont want this now, they want that now, who are we to believe this can communicate?" In the end you just put it out there and so we are...here goes...there's a video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylc4DekeOOI....and then an EP coming.